Thursday, December 31, 2009

The 12 Most WTF Christmas Songs (that are so bad they're good)

The 12 Most WTF Christmas Songs (that are so bad they're good)
It's no shock that my ice-cold no-heart absolutely goes coo-coo for Christmastime. I have written in the past about My Christmas Memories and My Favourite Gingers from Christmas TV Specials. And it was when I recently changed my radio station from CBC Radio 1 (99.1) to CHFI 98.1 (aka Mom Rock) to hear 24-hours of Christmas music daily that I thought "Why the hell haven't I written about my favourite Christmas songs yet?"

Exactly. And without further adoo, here is...

The 12 Most WTF Christmas Songs (that are so bad they're good)

12. All I Want for Christmas is You

Why it's bad: Are you kidding me? All you want for Christmas is a boyfriend? Who the fuck wrote this song, Cosmopolitan? Are you going to jam ice cubes into his taint the minute you get him? (You know...to seduce him. This is what Cosmo tells me men like. Taint-play and ice cubes). Mariah, I already got you a Sex and the City DVD set, and I can't return it...soooo....
Why it's so bad it's good: Do NOT sit there and tell me those first few bars of music don't scream THIS! IS! CHRISTMAAAAAS! The minute I hear the beginning of this song, I run to the kitchen to make an eggnog with rum.

11. Do They Know it's Christmas

Why it's bad: God, thanks for the reminder that the World is in the toilet, Captain Bringdown. I almost forgot that people were starving in Africa, and thanks to you I can no longer enjoy my candy cane by the fire. The lyric I hate the most is "In this world of plenty". Hey, Sir Bob Geldof! Come over to my house and tell me what's in my fridge! That's right, plenty of soy-sauce packets and expired Yogurt (that I definitely plan on eating). Oh, and when you're done counting all the boxes of baking soda in my fridge (Answer: 1) you can join me on my IKEA Klippan sofa (yes, that's the cheap one that smells like Swedish rats).
Why it's so bad it's good: It spawned America's We Are The World and Canada's Tears Are Not Enough. Two reasons, right there.

10. Last Christmas

Why it's bad: Dude, you're lucky that last Christmas all George Michael gave you was his heart. But seriously, for a man who meets nameless sex partners in the park at 3am, you'd think he wouldn't get so fucking emo about a guy not returning his calls.
Why it's so bad it's good: Who was the producer of this music video? Glamorshots?

9. White Christmas (Jingle Cats)

Why it's bad: IT'S FUCKING CATS.
Why it's so bad it's good: IT'S FUCKING CATS!!!!

8. Step Into Christmas

Why it's bad: Oh Elton Elton Elton. "Welcome to my Christmas song"? Jesus Christ, how lazy. Why not just lead off with "Looks like I'm writing a Christmas song...". Plus "We could watch the snow fall for ever and ever"? Have you ever sat watching snow fall for longer than 30 minutes? I'm pretty sure any longer and you turn into Jack Nicholson from The Shining.
Why it's so bad it's good: Elton John can do no wrong in my books. Plus, I like to imagine this was the time he was into the drugs; it's really the only way I can explain this song.

7. Christmas Is

Why it's bad: Only Family-Friendly Run DMC could have recorded this Christmas-Rap (aka CRAP). Imagine approaching NWA with this idea? Also, here is what I take away from this song:
- Santa doesn't hit up Inglewood
- Give Run DMC all your money
- Black kids are greedy. A Bike, Sega Genesis, AND a Nintendo?? I'd get the taste slapped out of my mouth if I asked for that much shit.
Why it's so bad it's good: He may be greedy, but I do love that little kid at the end. "Turn my Mommy's lights back on!" Oh, if only it was that easy...how much you have to learn.

6. The Christmas Song (Alvin & The Chipmunks)

Why it's bad: Is there anything more festive than a pushy stage dad forcing his children into the spotlight? I think Dina Lohan plays this song on repeat every Christmas. "Oh Ali, if only you were a rodent. I could work you twice as hard". But let's step back for a second and examine the song AND video, shall we?
1. Dave, a single man in his mid-30s, adopts 3 talking rodents. For the sake of argument, let's just pretend they're no different from children.
2. His first instinct is to force them into show business.
3. He builds a recording studio in his home to ensure they are working 24-7.
4. Alvin repeatedly asks for a hula-hoop for Christmas. What are hula-hoops, like $2? How much is the Chipmunk dynasty worth, like $9 million? Jesus Christ, buy the kid a damn hula-hoop! You're lucky he doesn't want Legal Emancipation for Christmas.
5. At 0:50, Alvin appears to be high. I will just go ahead and pretend I never saw Simon spraying that perfume and assume Dave is a hard-core narcotics user.
6. At 2:52, we can clearly see Alvin suffers from severe Tourettes Syndrome.
Why it's so bad it's good: Aw, this is a classic. If our current culture is any indication, highly-filtered and processed vocals will never go out of style!

5. I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas

Why it's bad: Who is this Richie Rich-motherfucker who is asking for a wild animal for Christmas?? AND he gets picky! "No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses". Oh, I'm sorry - I forgot how 2007 a Crocodile was. How about we just skip the hippo and go straight for hunting humans for sport? I'll get the rifle.
Why it's so bad it's good: This song is every stoner's dream: big long words, non-sequiturs, a weird child's voice, the vaguest connection to Christmas.

4. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer

Why it's bad: Um, it's a song about an elderly woman being bludgeoned to death by the hooves of a wild animal on Christmas Eve. How is this in any way appropriate for the Holiday season? And how long after her death was it written? In what fucked-up world does one receive news of a relative's death and your first thought is "Holy shit, this would make a hilarious song".
Why it's so bad it's good: I like to call this one The Redneck Carol. Grandma gets wasted on Christmas eve (probably on Eggnog and Cheaters Whiskey). She decides to go home because she has forgotten her medication and would like to spend the rest of the evening heavily sedated on prescription pills and cheap liquor. The next morning her family goes outside (to use the bathroom, presumably) and finds her dead body in the snow with a hoof print in her forehead (blunt force trauma). They mourn in the way they know best (black NASCAR shirts) and open the deceased's gifts. It's what Grandma would have wanted.

3. Santa Baby

Why it's bad: I have a feeling this is every Long Island/Jersey Shore trashbag's favourite Christmas song. Things mentioned in this song:
1. Tiffany jewelery
2. Penthouse apartment
3. Fur coat
4. Fancy car
5. The deed to a platinum mine (who is this bitch, Scrooge McDuck?)
6. Thinly-veiled sexual innuendo
Why it's so bad it's good: The Madonna-as-Betty Boop version, Eartha Kitt's version. Both very cute and adorable additions to a Christmas party playlist.

2. Baby It's Cold Outside

Why it's bad: WHERE DO I START?!?!?!?? Speaking of Jersey Shore, let's break this song down too:
1. Guy wants to get laid
2. Girl is all "Yo! I gotta bounce!"
3. Guy is like "These roofies say you're not going nowheres"
4. Girl is all "What's in this drink? For real, this ain't Sierra Mist!"
Why it's so bad it's good: It's just too darn charming :( I don't care how blatant the date-rape is in this song, it's adorable. Plus, with the guy-part/girl-part, it's great for karaoke.

1.
The Christmas Shoes


Why it's bad: I. JUST. CAN'T. I really cannot explain this song better than Patton Oswalt does. Enjoy - this is my Christmas present to all of you.

Source: www.skipraid.com

Last minute gift idea: Said The Whale's Islands Disappear

Last minute gift idea: Said The Whale's Islands Disappear

It's two days until Christmas. If you're still stuck on what to get that last person on your list, might I recommend a little Said The Whale.

The Vancouver-based indie band released an EP entitled West Coast Christmas on their website earlier this week, available for FREE.

Once you've gone and downloaded that, perhaps I can tempt you to purchase Islands Disappear, the band's full length album released in October.

The 13-song release features light, folk-infused indie rock, with lyrics inspired from experiences on the road in Canada.

A song entitled Gentleman particularly speaks to me with the lyric "I am an uncool Canadian kid / Uninspired by all the popular guys." I can only assume it was written about my high school experience.

Seriously though, in this grey winter that's now officially begun, it's nice to have a few songs to help fill the void the sun left behind.

Take a listen on the band's MySpace, then go make the purch.

Elle MacPherson Bikini Candids

Elle MacPherson Bikini Candids

Dogma

Dogma
Dogma is a film about two renegade angels Bartleby and Loki who were kicked out of heaven by God and they are trying to get back in by going through an archway of a church in Jersey that has been open for hundreds of years so that they can be forgiven and get the slate wiped clean but if they do that they will prove god wrong and undo everything that God has done meaning undoing the universe.

God has went missing so she can't stop them so the voice of God and God's assistant gets a women called Bethany to stop them with the help of two prophets Jay and Silent Bob, the 13th Apostle called Rufus and a muse turned stripper called Serendipity but the angels also have help by someone called Azreal he is a muse turned demon he is only helping them to get revenge on god for banning him from heaven he said that "he would rather not exist than go back to hell".

Bethany, the prophets and the 13th apostle go to the church to speak to the priest and asks him to cancel the Jubilee but he refuses so silent Bob steals his golf club then they go for a drink at a pub so that they can talk about what to do next but Azreal is there to stop them but he doesn't get very far because he tells silent Bob to hit him with the golf club thinking that it won't do nothing to him but what he didn't know was that the priest blessed it and it kills him then Bethany thinks she knows where God is and goes to the hospital and frees God from John Doe Jersey and she is released and she stops the angels in the end but not before they kill lots of people first. This film is really funny I would recommend watching it.
Source: susansbestfilms.blogspot.com

Luciana Salazar En Bikini Dorado

Luciana Salazar En Bikini Dorado
Luciana Salazar
Source: feedproxy.google.com

Bipasha Basu The sexiest Asian women 2007

Bipasha Basu The sexiest Asian women 2007

Bipasha Basu has been named the Sexiest Asian Woman in the World, 2007. Bipasha Basu is one of sexiest bollywood or hindi actress and in 2007th she was be the sexies women in the asian. Commenting on her selection, 28-year-old Bipasha, whose film Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal with boyfriend John Abraham is releasing on November 23, said: "I'm glad I got the crown back and will try and hold onto it this time. I think sexiness goes beyond just looks and is a total package, from your personality to the way you carry yourself in your every day life. I'm really grateful to whoever voted for me because I work very hard. Commenting on her selection, 28-year-old Bipasha, whose film Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal with boyfriend John Abraham is releasing on November 23, said: "I'm glad I got the crown back and will try and hold onto it this time. I think sexiness goes beyond just looks and is a total package, from your personality to the way you carry yourself in your every day life. I'm really grateful to whoever voted for me because I work very hard." She was look so sexy, it was not possible if she was be the sexiest women in the asia.

Source: sexywanita.blogspot.com

THE WORLD'S MOST EXPENSIVE PHONE

THE WORLD'S MOST EXPENSIVE PHONE

Devis Castellani

Devis Castellani
conosciamo meglio i protagonisti del calendario malemodel 2010 (ma anche 2009) devis castellani, 26 anni, 1,87 metri d'altezza. esperienze: sfilate milano/roma - fiere - fitting - presentatore -...

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Mallika Sherawat Videos

Mallika Sherawat Videos

Christmas Photo Contest Winner

Christmas Photo Contest Winner
Congrats to Kris in DC.  I’m always a sucker for animal photos!!! Posted in entertainment Tagged: Christmas, photography, photos

Congrats to Kris in DC.  I’m always a sucker for animal photos!!!

Posted in entertainment Tagged: Christmas, photography, photos

Source: thegirlfromtheghetto.wordpress.com

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Baby Margaretha - Cover Majalah

Baby Margaretha - Cover Majalah

Source: baby-margaretha.blogspot.com

Australia's Next Top Model

Australia's Next Top Model

David Beckham: Studly in Italy

David Beckham: Studly in Italy

Stepping out and looking as handsome as ever, David Beckham was spotted in Milan, Italy on Wednesday (December 30).

The soccer stud graciously smiled as he was escorted out of his vehicle while donning a black suit quite nicely.

And in a recent press conference, the soccer star expressed how happy he is to be back in Italy, saying that he was delighted to be back in Milan and looking forward to facing his former club team Manchester United in the Champions League.

As far as his time with the Los Angeles Galaxy team, Beckham added, “My experience with the club was so special for six months. It was one of the best six months of my career. I miss just being in Milan.”


Source: www.celebrity-gossip.net

Gwen Stefani Out In London

Gwen Stefani Out In London
Gwen Stefani Out In London

Gwen Stefani and her son Kingston stop at Starbucks for breakfast, after heading to the gym.

Kingston, who brought along a big dinosaur toy, roared fiercely at the photogs as they snapped away.

The “Just a Girl” songstress looked pretty in her pink coat as she strolled past the paparazzi.

Gwen Stefani - Out with Her Son in London
Gwen Stefani pictures Gwen Stefani pictures Gwen Stefani pictures Gwen Stefani pictures imagebam Gwen Stefani pictures

Source: celebpic.blogspot.com

Funky Little Feet - A Week in Celebrity Baby Shoes

Funky Little Feet - A Week in Celebrity Baby Shoes
Here is the first installment of my new feature - Funky Little Feet - A Week in Celebrity Baby Shoes. Four of our favourite little fashionistas show us their sole side:
  1. Violet Anne Affleck in her Crocs Cayman Shoes in White
  2. Ming Lee Simmons in Converse All Star Hi - Little Kids in Black
  3. Harlow Winter Kate Madden in See Kai Run Indria Baby Sandal in White
  4. Honor Marie Warren in pediped Katelyn in Silver

Source: gigiandlulu.blogspot.com

Fringe Files: August Photo Gallery

Fringe Files: August Photo Gallery

HD screenshots of Fringe episode 208: August are now available at FringeFiles.com.

These screen caps have all been hand selected to increase quality and reduce duplicates, but if there's something that might be missing, you can request a specific Fringe screenshot in the Fringe Easter Eggs section.
Source: www.fringetelevision.com

Starstruckk ft Katy Perry – 30h!3

Starstruckk ft Katy Perry – 30h!3

My Life's Message

My Life's Message


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Osiris Pombo - Fotos de la Modelo Argentina

Osiris Pombo - Fotos de la Modelo Argentina

Source: www.malcriadasperu.com

2009 Fall Shoe/Handbag Guide

2009 Fall Shoe/Handbag Guide
This one word will describe the fall trend for 2009 shoes and handbags...WILD!! Leopard print is everywhere this '09 fall season..direct from the fashion magazines..straight to the designers like Jimmy Choo! This print is perfect for anyone..any age regardless of body type,skin color, shoes size! Anyone can rock this look! With just a dash of it your whole look can become very chic and will put you right on top of the fashion radar! I have a few pairs of flats, heels and even a scarf! If your new to the pattern start small, accessorize with a leopard print clutch or a scarf.
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rsvp at ShopStyle



It started with Balmain's fabulous crystal studded sandals (who could forget those?), and now we have belts, boots, jackets, and handbags all covered in studs.

Check out the wide assortment of studded bags , there are lots to choose from!
As for styling, you should consider the studded handbag your statement accessory - there's no need to go overboard with studs, stick to one item at a time.


The look is more rock chic than high glam, so combine this item with your fav denim jacket & skinny black pants. Or take a casual black shift dress and give it a kick with a bright studded tote.
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Bebe at ShopStyle